Saturday, January 26, 2008
Suicide.
My friend wrote a suicide note this week.
Rather convincing.
I was like, OMG WHERE ARE YOU.
The after-effects were rather funny.
Nevertheless, it has inspired me to do the same.
See how it'd turn out.
Who knows, maybe I'll persuade myself to die.
Just kidding.
I never thought I would do this. I always thought that committing suicide was a rather stupid idea. But it doesn't matter now, because it'd end all this pain. Nevertheless, if you're reading this, it probably means that I'm dead, which is good. At least I don't have to deal with all the pain now. I don't have to hide under the blanket, and wet my pillow in secret. I don't have to deal with countless, sleepless nights. I don't have to miss you, I don't have to think about you. I don't have to feel that I belong to nowhere. I don't have to feel alone. I don't have to say it didn't hurt when it did. I don't have to say it didn't matter when it did. I don't have to try convincing myself that you care. I don't have to act nonchalant. I don't have to act like I hate you. I don't have to live 3 years ago. I don't have to cling to the past. I don't have to be the exception. I don't have to think fairy tales. All it takes, is just this razor blade.
Easy, isn't it? How fragile one's life can be. Maybe it's made to be so easy, when you can't handle all this excruciation. Oh, don't you want to be loved dearly, but no one is there to love me so, not even you. I loved you so.
Sorry, this is how I bleed for you.
Sorry Mom, and Dad, this is how I repay my debt, my blood and flesh.
I'm glad it's this easy.
Because this is how I disappear.
8:26 PM; `dead.Y